It’s not what you think.
I’m not about to talk about parental failure. I’m talking about our kids and their choices in life.
They might turn your world upside down – but that’s not necessarily a bad thing…
Considering all the work we put into our kids, it’s natural to think that they might consider us when making their choices.
Six months before we were married, I considered moving out into an apartment that I found in the want ads. My dad found the ad and confronted me. He said that it would “kill Mom” if I moved out. I didn’t really understand, because to me it wasn’t a big deal. I just wanted to experience life out on my own before I committed to a forever home with my future DH.
But being the dutiful daughter that I was, I nixed my plan and stayed home until our wedding day, never to mention it again. To this day I don’t even know if my dad told my mom.
That was only one of many decisions that was influenced by my concern for my parents and their opinion of me.
Silly me. I thought all my kids would be the same way.
I hate to burst your bubble.
If you are like me, you have this pie in the sky expectations of what you think raising a family would be like. Come on down from those clouds and visit the real world. I live there now and it’s not so bad.
To be happy and have peace as parents, realize:
- Our happiness does not hinge on others.
- Our adult children have their own minds – we can’t control them nor should we.
- We should not take our kids choices personally.
- The worst could happen and we (with the Lord’s help) will still be OK.
And…this is the biggest bullet I can give you:
- God can use EVERYTHING and ANYTHING that happens to grow and mature our kids.
Don’t be afraid of the future for your kids. Do your best to raise them properly and then when they go out on their own, give yourself permission to let go.
They may choose a completely out of the box path, pursuing a crazy life opposite of your dreams and goals, but don’t despair.
You’ve heard that saying, “Let go and let God?” It sounds so trite. But it is true in this case.
There is a time in your kids’ lives that they will step out and become their own person. There will be mistakes. They may disappoint you, hurt you, or even ditch you. They might turn your world upside down. But don’t lose hope.
I have seen the worst situations in my kids’ lives change them in a way that I never could. Real life can make such a huge impact – so don’t fear. Give yourself a break, sit back and watch God work.
As parents we think we know the road our children should travel, but God may have other plans. Trust Him.
Remember He loves your kids more than you do.
He’s got this.
God isn’t finished with them. Or you. And that’s the truth.
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