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Adoption Educating Our Children Family Parenting tips

Does your child run away? Parenting Tip # 12

 

Running away from your problems is a race you will never win…

Recently a mom contacted me about her teenage son who has developed the habit of running away when he is upset.

We had a couple of kids try that a few times and it caused huge stress for our family. It’s a heart breaking moment when your child runs through the door when you are in the middle of a parenting moment. If you want to experience mind numbing F.E.A.R., just watch your child go out the door in a fit of defiance!

Does your child run away? Keep a Journal {Mom of Many}
To download this FREE full resolution JPG word art, click the picture above.

Running away:

  1. Exacerbates the problem because you can’t deal with it if they aren’t there!
  2. Disrupts the family and scares the other children.
  3. Puts them, you, and your family immediately at risk legally (you never know what they will do on the run).
  4. Is unsafe for the child to be running around unsupervised.
  5. Puts the public at risk because the child isn’t thinking clearly.
  6. Is an act of rebellion – it must be addressed.

This was what I told the M.O.M. – in a nut shell.

I never did this but found myself wishing I had. Live and learn, right?

Does your child run away? Keep a Journal {Mom of Many}

  1. If your child has developed a habit of running away, be sure to call 911 IMMEDIATELY to let them know your child is on the run.
  2. Be sure to let your child know ahead of time that if they run, you will call the police. Be clear that you love them and will do it to protect them, you, the rest of the family and the public.
  3. Keep a journal EVERY DAY if you have a child that acts out. This will give you credibility if you run into any legal issues. Because I had NO PAPER TRAIL, my word was disregarded in time of crisis.
  4. Get a good support system that will come to your aid day or night. Fill in at least one trusted friend and your pastor so there are others who will back you up in time of crisis and come to your house if you need them.

I had a good support system in place just weeks before our last incident, so between them and the Lord’s protection, we were fine. But it could have turned out disastrous!

If you need support join our M.O.M. group. We get it.

Val @ Mom of Many

MomofMany.net

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Family Parenting tips

M.O.M. A New Facebook Mom’s Support Group

Helping and Healing {Love My DIY Home}

Have you ever felt isolated, out of options or ganged up on? Do you wish you could find someone who understands?

Then join us at M.O.M. Click on the side banner in the right or CLICK HERE. >>>

For many years I felt isolated and alone. Now you don’t have to.

If you are a mom and interested in joining a new Facebook mom’s community where you will find:

  • no judgement
  • acceptance
  • ideas and advice
  • other moms who “get it”
  • a safe place of support

You will get information on our “closed” Facebook group and others goodies along the way.  Join M.O.M.

Meanwhile,

Keep being amazing!

Val @ Mom of Many

MomofMany.net

 

Categories
Adoption Family Parenting tips

Why do we think we can control our kid’s every move? Parenting Tip #10

FREE Good Moms Word Art {Mom of Many}Time for a reality check, moms!

  1. No one is perfect. God only calls us to be faithful, not perfect. His Son was the only perfect person that walked this earth.
  2. Parenting can be hard, especially if you have “interesting” children. Do your best, give God the rest.
  3. You only see what others let you see.  A perfect house and perfectly behaved children? It’s all an illusion.
  4. Even God’s children (Adam and Eve) disobeyed and disappointed their Father. Who are we to think we can control our kids’ every decision and action?
  5. God knows we are “but flesh” so He understands our weaknesses and failings and still loves us. (Psalm 78:39)

This is for you today – a word art to help you to remember that we are all human just trying to do our best:

Good Moms FREE Word Art {Mom of Many}

To download a high resolution JPG for printing, click on the word art above or here.

Now go out and be amazing!

Val @ Mom of Many

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Categories
Adoption My Kids Notable Acts Parenting tips

When God Blows You Away – Parenting Tip #8

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

Today’s tip is very simple.

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

When God Blows You Away - the story of our son {Mom of Many}

Never give up on your kids – no matter what.

Our only job as parents is to be faithful.

We are to provide for them, love them, teach them and point them to God. When our job is complete and they go out on their own, God will take over and do His work. We must let Him do it and trust His methods.

He knows. We don’t. We just have to trust.

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

Let me tell you about my son.

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

We adopted our son when he was nearly four months old. He had been in an orphanage since birth.

When we went to the airport to pick him up, I took a little tuxedo sleeper to change him into to bring him home. When I dressed him I was shocked to see how weak his limbs were – I was scared to move him around for fear I would break him!

It took us months to get a handle on his health issues. He was allergic to formula so we had to switch to goat’s milk.

He came down with Pneumonia every few weeks, which eventually brought us an asthma diagnosis. For many years we treated his asthma attacks at home with a nebulizer. Asthma is scary.

He earned the title “interesting” kid early on in his life because of his strong will and headstong personality – but fortunately he was endearing. He drew people to him with his magnetic personality and loving heart.

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

Along came the teen years.

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

Let’s just say they were challenging. 🙂

He went to Bible college after high school – simply because we asked him to. He and I had many discussions about his future when he was a teen. He disliked my idea that he would be a great servant of God if he’s just surrender. He assumed I meant ministry, which he vehemently opposed. I tried to assure him not ministry but some sort of service to God with his life. I saw great potential in him but surrender has never been in his vocabulary.

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

Often folks will deny God’s call because of a fear of what God will ask them to do.

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

I knew this to be the case with our son. There was no way I could assure him that to follow God’s call is the safest and most rewarding place to be.

The summer after his first year at college he joined the Marines and went to boot camp. We had hoped he would wait until he was done with college – when he was older. The entire next year at college was a struggle and we feared for our son.

Not long after that he went to Iraq.  He knew I would be worried about him, so he called home often with a SAT phone while standing on the roof of his Humvee to get a signal. I lived for those calls!

Later he volunteered for an overseas mission. Military service can take its toll, but at the same time can be an experience that builds character and strengthens a man’s heart.

The influences in the military and the many losses he has endured over the past few years took its toll. We begged God to preserve him.

When God Blows You Away - the story of our son {Mom of Many}

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

I’ve never regretted adopting my kids.

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

I have feared for our kids over the years and wondered at times if they would ever make it to adulthood and be happy, well adjusted adults. It has been hard watching them go through the pain of loss, regret, rejection – and all of what this world can bring. Of course every mom is concerned for their kids, but when you adopt “interesting” kids, often they have a lot to overcome – much more than those who have had the advantage of a smooth and uneventful beginning.

Today I can assure you that our son has indeed not only survived but is thriving. He has reconciled all of his past and has built his character. He has come through his challenges and become an amazing man – one who defends our freedom and cares for others.

 

When God Blows You Away - the story of our son {Mom of Many}

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

He has a new mission – one that most men would not consider EVER:

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

Quote from his GoFundMe account on Facebook:

“I am returning to Iraq to help the Kurds. I was honorably discharged as a Sergeant in the US Marine Corps Infantry, and have a history with Iraq and that region of the world.

…My goal is to head there with a couple cameras/camcorders, Go Pro, laptop, SD cards, etc. This will allow me to upload everything stateside so that my liaisons in the US can connect the story and spread it to the public. 

For the past 3-4 years I have strongly thought about going back. The past year was not a pleasant one which led me to make my decision to go back. Some thought/think that I am running away from something, and so did I for a little. I’m actually running toward something, it took me a while to get grounded to my roots, the reason why I initially felt I needed to help the Kurds. 

My initial plan was to just head over and fight with the Kurds, but the saying “The pen is mightier than the sword” is so very true. This mission is about fighting alongside the Kurds and telling their story, but it’s [also] about telling the story of the Veterans of Afghanistan and Iraq who are back in Iraq volunteering with the Kurds. It’s about telling the story of the couple thousand people from all over the world banded together to fight for humanity. My goal is to tell a story of people who take no heed of race, religion, language, ethnicity, region of the world, but see each other as brothers and sisters of this world. 

The overall goal to tell this story, this documentary, is for global education on global awareness. If enough people can see that people are standing up to fight for humanity, we can get even more people to stand together. While the nations of the world can never agree on one thing, we as humans can all agree that the Kurds deserve the basic rights of humanity: Life. There is a hate out there that people are trying to extinguish. If we as humans of the world can band together to end this hate, maybe we can start to see each other as brothers and sisters of the planet we share. To give the next generation a chance of hope. The story just needs to be told.

I am blessed to call him son and pray God will preserve him as he goes to help the helpless. He truly is a credit to his nation and is willing to put his life on the line to protect those in need. What a great work God has done – He has truly blown me away.

When God Blows You Away - the story of our son {Mom of Many}

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

Not only am I proud of our son; he is MY HERO.

Parenting Tip for Adoptive Moms {Mom of Many)

There is hope moms – cling to it.

UPDATE: Due to the changing political scene, Andrew took up a different mission. Rather than going to fight, he went to save the refugees fleeing the war torn nations. Catch up on his mission here: AndrewFrania.com. He has found his calling.

Val @ Mom of Many

All photos by Charizma Photography, L.L.C. @ www.charizmaphotography.com. Katy Frey is an amazing photographer – check out her site. You will be blessed.

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