- Do you know your child WELL?
- Do you have their best interests at heart – are they your priority?
- Do you take the time to get to know your kids’ friends?
- Are you a good example?
- Are you involved in EVERY part of your kids’ lives – school, faith (church), home, outside activities, hobbies, friends, etc.?
- Do you know the adults WELL that are responsible for supervision when you are not around?
- Do you pay attention to what is going on in your family, with your kids, and those they spend time with?
- Do you talk to your kids – and listen?
- Do you supervise well and watch for issues that need to be addressed?
- Are you consistent, available and faithful?
If you answer “Yes” to these questions then I’d say you can trust your mama instincts. Too many times I let others’ opinions influence my decisions negatively. It took me years to shut out the whisperings and follow my own mama bear instincts. If you have no one to support you, and you believe your are doing the best you can, then go find someone that you respect, has experience, and can get in your corner.
Stick to your guns.
We don’t like it when people criticize our parenting. But then we stress over their “advice”. We know that if others criticize us then we must be doing something wrong – um, no. Not necessarily. We need to confidently hold our own if we truly feel we are doing what God has appointed us to do. We need to reek of confidence when we deal with our kids too. Why do we cave when our kids throw a fit over our parenting? We need to drip of confidence in order to get our kids to take us seriously and have reason to trust us.
You are not your kids’ friend.
Make it clear that you are the Mom and you will make hard decisions when needed. Let them know that no matter what, you will always look out for them and choose what is best, ALWAYS – even when they don’t agree. If you are a good mom, and if you are reading this I’ll bet you are a stellar mom, then trust your intuition. Ask God for guidance and then do what you think is best – even if others disagree – even if your kids throw a fit.
Learn, grow, ask questions, seek advice.
Keep your eyes peeled, consider, evaluate, follow through. Your kids are counting on you and if they don’t agree, do your mama thing anyway. I do believe we ought to listen to them and consider their wishes, if they present it properly. But remember: they need your guidance even if they don’t want it or appreciate it.
“When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.”